'Yo!' As my trainer would say, I was 'killing it' this morning in Bootcamp. Rocking it. Cranking it! For the first time when he called out an exercise towards the end of a 45 minute workout, full sit ups, I couldn't wait to begin.

I had this and I knew it. I practiced full sit ups at home all last fall until I could do them after still struggling with ab work during my Noon Bootcamp class. I got tired of always half ass doing exercises because of my weak abdominal muscles or because of my knee injury (which was legit and still hurts during certain exercises or if I push myself too hard). All around me people had been doing full sit ups and there I lay, half way raising up off the mat.

I was discoureged. I was tired of finishing last. I could see some progress from when I started. Even though when it was time to jog around the building I was always the last to round the corner, at least I wasn't getting lapped by people anymore. I used to only be able to walk the laps, now I could semi-jog. But it wasn't enough. I'm not the kind of girl who finishes last and it was wearing on me always being behind, adapting expercises to cater to my injury and weaknesses, feeling not as good as the others.

One night at home, I was laying on the floor playing with the babies and when it was time to sit up, I all of a sudden pulled up in a sit up position.... with no pain! I lay right back down and did it again. And did it again. And again until my daughter crawl-tackled me, amused at my little game. Holy shit I could do a sit up!

This was major for me because 4 months earlier when I started Bootcamp in the summer, I could barely even do a crunch. I was 12 weeks off my second c-section in less than as many years and my insides were still healing. Any ab work hurt.

Why wouldn't it, pregnancy itself is a shock to the body even though its what we as women were designed to do, carry a baby around on our inside. Throw in back to back pregnancies (one with TWINS!) with back to back surgeries involing all the layers of your gut being cut open and sewed back together and no wonder my abs hurt! That shit is jarring and tramatic to your body, someone cutting through all the skin, fat, muscle, tissue, utuerus walls to rip out soemthing that is literally growing and attched to your body. Ah, childbirth via c-section! It ain't pretty, but I can usually find a positive to any situation... at least my goodies survived tight and in tact!

I digress...

By November after my realization I could in fact do a sit up with no pain, I came to the conclusion the only thing holding me back had been the memory of the pain and fear that it might hurt. It didn't actually hurt anymore to do a sit up. I was siking myself out!

After that little break through it was over. When it was time to 'crank it in 5...4...3...2...1' I was off. Back straight, arms straight up over my head, slow coming up and going down, measured breathing, head high, shoulders back. Perfect execution. The best thing about it, all of a sudden I wasn't the weakest one in the class. The women on either side of me were both struggling, unable to do even one, and there I was knocking them out. It felt great.

One of the girls asked, 'Leah, how do you do that with all them babies?'

'Hard work. I practice. 3 months ago I couldn't do one either.'

I tell her a brief version of my story hoping I am an inspiration to not give up and keep trying. I want other mothers especially to know they can do it, just don't give up. We are MOTHERS! We can do anything!

Best of all was the realization that I was no longer the weakest one in the class. There were people in there who couldn't do the things I could. I was no longer finishing behind the pack.

Dare I say I am a leader?